tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74243615734432518742024-03-14T04:07:27.939-05:00my life as mommyAndrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.comBlogger96125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-4365324039940360982016-02-11T10:37:00.000-06:002016-02-11T10:37:38.214-06:00How our family of 5 cruised to the Bahamas for around $3000Wow, I had NO CLUE that so many people would want to hear about this! When I recently posted on a couponing facebook group I follow that we were able to take such a wonderful family vacation for so little, I couldn't believe how many people commented that they wanted details on how we made it happen. So here's what I learned, hopefully someone out there is able to use the info to plan their family's next dream vacation too!<br />
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First of all, one of the biggest things I can recommend is PLAN AHEAD, like way, way, way ahead! We started planning about a year and a half out, officially booked and started paying on our trip about a year out. The farther in advance you plan, the more time you have to search for great deals and save! <br />
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There are several huge benefits to cruising, in my opinion. Especially with a family. Here are a few of the reasons our family will continue to cruise for future vacations:<br />
1. Everything (necessary) is included in your cost. Yes, your included drinks are limited (coffee, tea, lemonade, juices, and milks are free) and you have to pay extra for offshore excursions but TECHNICALLY speaking, if you are on a very tight budget, once you get on board, it is possible to not spend a single cent and still have a GREAT vacation!<br />
2. It's a great option for a family! With all the kids activities available on board, Chris and I could have felt like it was a couples vacation if we had wanted (we didn't want to, we spent lots of time as a family doing so many great activities). You're kids will never say "I'm bored" on a cruise. And back to that "all included" point, you aren't stuck spending $20-$200 on every little outing your kids want to take while you are on vacation. From water slides to shows to mini golf, there is plenty to do! I have yet to find another vacation our family could take for 5 days that would include our place to stay, all our meals, and all our entertainment for a price even CLOSE to that of a cruise.<br />
3. You get to see more than one place. Unlike a trip to just one all inclusive resort or hotel, you are traveling while you are vacationing. We did some excursions that helped teach our kids local history and culture while we were at our ports, and we got to see so many things we never had before.<br />
4. You can't fly to many of these islands for what it costs to cruise there. When you consider that a cruise can cost a little as $200-$300 for up to 5 days, you'll quickly discover it's hard to fly to the Bahamas for that cost, and then you still have to come up with the hotel, meals, activities. When you are on a budget, I just don't see how you can beat taking a cruise!<br />
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Do I have you convinced to book your next cruise yet? Yes? Okay, well here's what we did to get the BEST deal for our family.<br />
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1. We cruised Carnival. I have heard AMAZING things about many different lines, and I'm sure they are all great. We cruised Carnival because; 1. we were on a tight budget and they were cheapest and 2. I had cruised them before and had a fantastic time. If you have the extra money, then of course, go Disney or Royal Caribbean or whatever floats your boat. If you need a lot for a little, with Carnival you won't be disappointed. <br />
2. We booked 2 rooms. We could have possibly saved a few hundred dollars all cramming into one ocean view room but, lets be honest, some things just aren't worth the sacrifice. We chose to book two adjoining rooms and kept the door in between open the entire trip. Additionally, we parked our youngest child's pack and play in front of the kid's room door, so there was no way for anyone to go in or out. This route saved us quite a bit over booking a suite but still gave us two bathrooms, and a little more privacy. It also gave us a way to have our younger two nap without ALL of us having to nap (although...I did nap ;) ). I've discovered it's hard to get the two adjoining rooms online, my one complaint about Carnival is their website, but once you know what you want by searching online you can call and their excellent customer service will help you get set up with adjoining rooms. <br />
3. Be flexible with your where and when you want to go. Our anniversary and my 30th birthday fall in the middle of hurricane season (which we didn't realize until after we booked at an amazing price...oops!). What I learned is that as long as you aren't stuck on where you end up, cruising in the fall is great! If a hurricane is a possibility, the cruise ships will reroute to different stops to keep you out of harms way. For example, we were scheduled to stop in Freeport and Nassau, Bahamas. We didn't run into any trouble but if there was a chance of bad weather, they may have taken us to Key West or Cayman Islands, or any of the other Carnival ports that were within sailing distance of Jacksonville, FL (where we cruised out of). Winter and Spring also tend to have really good rates. Also, since we didn't care where we went, we just wanted to go somewhere we had never been before, we were able to search and compare where the cheapest cruises were out of, and then search and compare where the cheapest flights were to, and combine that info to get the best overall rate. <br />
4. Make payments. Carnival often runs "Half Price Deposits," which is what we used when we booked. We "reserved" our rooms for $50 per person, and then paid a little bit every paycheck. As a bonus, we would make payments with Carnival gift cards, which we would buy at Dillons during 4x Fuel Points weekends to rack up free gas! Even during regular weeks we earned 2x Fuel Points on the gift cards so we made sure to ALWAYS make our payments this way. Little $50 and $100 payments every two weeks added up quickly to help us finish paying off our cruise without ever having to use a credit card and rack up more debt. <br />
5. Airfare will cost almost as much as your cruise. Be prepared for this. We have already decided the next time we cruise we are going to plan for a bigger trip but drive to port instead of fly. When it comes to buying 5 airplane tickets and then having to stress about weather and cancelled or delayed flights, sometimes it just might be the easier route. However, with this trip we did fly. We flew Delta, watched for deals for several months leading up, and booked all our tickets when we got our tax return so that, again, nothing had to go on the credit card. My biggest suggestion if you do choose to fly is to fly out at least a day early. If your flight gets cancelled or so delayed you'll miss the boat, you can hop in a car and book it so you don't miss your ship! If you miss your ship all that work and planning and saving will before nothing. That being said, our flight got cancelled and Delta took excellent care of us! It wasn't an ideal situation but we made it in the nick of time (thanks to having that extra day built in) and that's all that matters.<br />
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If you've read all that and want to see how our trip broke down to about $3000, here are the details:<br />
Carnival Cruise: We paid right around $260 per person for our 5 day cruise out of Jacksonville to the Bahamas in October 2015. This was for 2 ocean view rooms. I just did a quick search and there some very similar prices available if this was a route you would want to go. Again, you'll have to be flexible with your dates. Our total cruise cost, including taxes and fees (but not including gratuities, which we did prepay a few weeks ahead of the trip) was around $1,680. Again, this includes all the meals and plenty of on board activities. We did spend some extra on excursions and a fun "Cat in the Hat" breakfast, but that was optional.<br />
Flights: We were able to book with Delta for $313 per person including taxes. We only had to buy four tickets since our youngest was still under 2 so our total for that came to $1,252. <br />
Overnight hotel in Jacksonville: This was originally in our budget so I'm including it here, but Delta actually covered our hotel in Atlanta as part of the whole cancelled flight fiasco. We booked at an airport hotel with an airport shuttle for about $130 per night. I can't comment on the hotel because we never actually stayed there but it looked very nice.<br />
Taxi to the ship: Here's a big piece of advice- if more than two are travelling in your party, DO NOT BOOK AIRPORT TRANSFERS THROUGH CARNIVAL! They charge something like $20- $40 per person EACH WAY! We booked through a local company for less than half the cost of the Carnival transfers and had someone waiting for us the minute we stepped of the plane and again as soon as we stepped off the boat. (I think we paid $45 total each way for our transfers).<br />
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I hope that gets you all started on booking your next big trip. If you have any questions, I'll do my best to answer!<br />
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<br />Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-47500049319787175182015-09-17T21:34:00.002-05:002015-09-17T21:34:53.316-05:00when forgiveness is hardThose words, they didn't just sting. They cut to my heart and made me question every piece of myself. They were the same words Satan whispers to me over and over again, every. Single. Day. "You just aren't good enough." I may have fought for years trying not to believe those words, but coming from you, someone I thought I could trust, coming fresh and new and for the world to see, suddenly their truth swept me up again into a whirlpool of self doubt and depression. <div>
Wise words reminded me to forgive. Of course, forgive. It's so simple, right? Just utter the three words "I forgive you" and we all smile and pretend the pieces are right where they should be.</div>
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But for me, hurting, angry, forgiveness doesn't come easy. Shouting the verses at me doesn't make it easier. I know God asks if of me, so I'll say those three words. I'll say them a hundred times and then a hundred times more. But that hurt. Its still there.</div>
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How does that really happen? How does God do it for us DAILY? And why can't I seem to? What does it even mean when you say you forgive but the hurt and bitterness sweeps over again every time we meet? </div>
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And then, tonight, months later, He shows me.</div>
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“As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, <b>bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace</b>. There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called to one hope when you were called; one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.”</div>
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Ephesians 4:1-6 NIV</div>
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<i><b>Bearing...in love...keep the unity.</b></i></div>
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When, where did I get this idea in my head that forgiveness is for me, or the other person? If it's possible, I was trying, unsuccessfully, to forgive for all the wrong reasons. Saying three words, no matter how much you <i>should</i>, won't change your heart. </div>
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But I love the Church, the bride of Christ. I would do anything...even...forgive. Because that unity, hear me Church, we will get NOWHERE without it. But if forgiveness really is the key to changing the world, then it MUST start <b>HERE</b>. The world will laugh harder in our faces and hurt will run deeper in our cities until we can get it together. </div>
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And when finally, my heart softened and the forgiveness was real, I found myself also forgiving myself. </div>
Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-13616462533530860852015-07-06T18:28:00.000-05:002015-07-06T18:28:23.781-05:00when my heart is overwhelmed<div style="text-align: center;">
<em>"From the ends of the earth I call to you,</em></div>
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<em>When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the rock that is higher than I." - Psalm 61:2</em></div>
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<strong>when my heart is overwhelmed with joy</strong><br />
When I look down at my children and my heart swells as they smile up at me; a squeaky "I love you," barely audible or understandable except by the one who knows that voice better than my own; when a squeal of joy and arms splayed open greet me, squeezing my legs tight at my arrival from work, as if the entire day has led up to this moment of homecoming; when sleepy eyes finally succumb to the sleep they've been fighting and sighs breathe heavy and this baby that once slept in my arms every night once again falls asleep, if just for a few short hours, near my chest; when laughter abounds and I momentarily escape the reality that these years are going to pass all to quickly and in the blink of an eye these babes will spread their wings and fly; when I consider the beautiful gift that these children you have entrusted to me are, and I'm overwhelmed by your graciousness, lead me to the rock where I'm reminded that I must also entrust them to you, for my joy is made most full in light of the giver of joy.<br />
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<em>"Be truly glad. There is wonderful joy ahead."- 1 Peter 1:6</em></div>
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<strong>when my heart is overwhelmed with sorrow</strong><br />
When I consider the plans failed and the dreams that remain unreachable; when regret shouts at me that my failures will define my future; when tears stream down the cheeks of dear ones over hurts and brokenness, and my words fail me but my heart shares the pain; when I mourn the relationships of close friends who live faraway and those who have grown distant although they remain nearby and the dark of loneliness begins to suffocate; when I am overwhelmed by the many heartaches of this word, lead me to the rock that promises redemption of <em>every </em>situation.<br />
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<em>"I will not cause pain without allowing something new to be born, says the LORD." -Isaiah 66:9</em></div>
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<strong>when my heart is overwhelmed with anxiety</strong><br />
When uncertainty about the future of my children steals my time and my focus is fixated on the questions looming ahead rather than the guaranteed present; when I shut myself down and stumble backward because these prison walls I create seem more comforting than the fear of rejection; when I close my fists and cling tightly to all I have, as if I can provide myself with a sense of security, because my faith in your provision has once again been given a backseat and my need for control has taken over the steering wheel; when I am overwhelmed by the exhaustion of needing to know what happens next, lead me to the rock that promises a perfectly mapped plan for my future.<br />
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<em>"...It is the LORD who goes before you. He will be with you; he will never leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed."- Deuteronomy 31:8</em></div>
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Oh Father, I tend to find my heart in a constantly overwhelmed state, not often enough with joy and too often with sorrow and anxiety. Plant my feet on the steady rock of your unwavering promises, and when I start to be swayed by the winds, clasp my hand in your nail scarred hands and remind me that even in this moment, you will hold me steady until the storm passes.</div>
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</div>
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<em>"From the ends of the earth I call to you,</em></div>
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<em>When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the rock that is higher than I." - Psalm 61:2</em></div>
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Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-11623638935429909442015-07-01T13:17:00.000-05:002015-07-01T13:17:32.608-05:00A Post for the Moms Who Made It ThroughThere are tons of great "Mommy Bloggers" out there. Seems like everytime I turn around a friend has posted a link to a wonderful blog with a letter from a fellow mom of toddlers. It usually fits into one of three categories: "Post for the Mom Who is Worn Out Like Me", "Tearjerker Letter For Moms About Loving Your Children", or "Moms Unite! The Outside World Just Doesn't Understand What We {moms} Are Going Through." They are all so well written, and provide a bit a salve for our poured out, dried out hearts that yearn for someone to understand us. We take comfort in realizing we aren't the only one who longs for the days when we haven't cleaned up three spills by 9:00 am and are still in sweatpants when we run to buy dinner groceries at 4:30 pm. And then a few minutes {or on a bad day, hours} later we log off our smartphones and rejoin reality. We get called to the kitchen to clean up that fouth spill and try to remember the article that told us these fleeting moments pass all too quickly. This post isn't for you moms. <br />
This post is for those moms who aren't in this life stage anymore, this "tunnel of toddlerhood," or even childhood, or maybe the teenage years. This post is for the ones who've come out on the other side and can say, with absolute confidence, <strong>"You've. Got. This."</strong> <br />
My generation, my fellow mothers, we are <em>ACHING</em> for women to come alongside us and cheer us on. To mentor us when our harsh words spill over onto our children in our frustration, to rejoice with us when our pride swells for our reading preschooler, to listen to us and cry with us when tears won't stop becuase we just can't seem to feel like we measure up. <br />
Remind me of the working woman in Proverbs when my guilt for picking up an extra shift at work chokes me and tells me I'm failing my children by not being able to stay home. Text us scriptures and pray for us throughout the day because surely you remember how, despite our best efforts to make time for the Lord each morning, undoubtedly one kid woke up early and needed a glass of milk and then the other threw a fit about running out of Cocoa Puffs and before you know it we are running 5 minutes late for work and haven't had time to find where the baby hid our Bible, let alone read it. <br />
Volunteer to love on my kids in the nursery because my weary soul really needs a moment of quiet to just heal. Please invite us over for a meal because I really need a break from all these dishes {and be gracious when my 6 year old refuses to eat the lovely vegetables you put on his plate and my toddler spills his water all over your table}. Understand when I turn down invites to fun ladies nights, it's not becuase I don't want desperatly to be a part, but becuase I can't stand to give up one more night with my family when I already feel like I miss out on so much. Can we do dessert after I put them to bed, instead? <br />
<strong>And, more than anything, tell us we are <em>loved</em>, we are <em>enough</em>.</strong> And when we say "Thanks" and smile with that smile that doesn't quite reach our eyes becuase we know you are saying that to be nice, say it again, and again, and again, and squeeze us tight so that the love can't help but pour into our bones and refill all those empty places where we've given everything we had left to give.<strong>That love that you pour out into us, we <em>need</em> more of that transformational love in our lives.</strong> <br />
We need women like you to help mommies like us make it through. Because we are tired, we are beat down, and we are ready to give up. No one else knows this struggle--except YOU. <br />
<em>"By this, all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have LOVE for one another." John 13:35</em><br />
Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-8866308520330567762014-10-21T16:48:00.001-05:002014-10-21T16:48:22.148-05:00{1,000 Gifts} I took a look around.<br />
I found myself full of disappointment, discontentment, regret.<br />
I longed for a change. I needed a change. I was ready to change.<br />
I remembered a book a friend had been reading several months back, so I logged onto my Amazon account and two days later I sat down and started the book that began a much needed new journey of graditude and hope.<br />
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<img src="http://onethousandgifts.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/book.png" /><br />
"Thanks is what multiples the joy and makes any life large, and I hunger for it.. To name a thing is to manifest the meaning and value God gave it." Ann Voskamp<br />
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Each day I add to my list of gifts that I find. Each day my perspective for seeing the gifts becomes a little broader, a little clearer. Each day I realize that I am so blessed RIGHT. WHERE. I. AM. In the midst of chores and schedules and dirty diapers, I find myself right were I am meant to be at this very moment in history. This journey isn't always the route I would have chosen, but God WILL use it. He will use every pit stop and road block and detour to shower His blessings on me, if I will only choose to see them.<br />
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Todays gifts:<br />
1. Warm, cozy blankets for sleeping with the windows open on cool fall nights<br />
2. All the littles sleeping in sweetly past 7 am<br />
3. A few moments just be and my oldest before heading off to work<br />
4. A midday text from my BFF<br />
5. Candy and gifts from my boss for RT week (happy RT week!)<br />
6. A good laugh shared with a coworker<br />
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How about you? Can you name 5 blessings RIGHT NOW?<br />
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{{Chris and I are starting a small group on Sunday nights and if you are in the Great Bend area we would love to have you join us! We are going to be doing the 1000 Gifts small group series starting Nov 2nd. }}<br />
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Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-62205452294307046022014-10-08T15:26:00.000-05:002014-10-08T15:52:38.784-05:00what i didn't know then7 years ago, when Chris and I stood on the City Stage of Kansas City's Union Station, there was a lot I thought I knew about marriage. <br />
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7 years ago I knew that I was marrying my best friend. I didn't know that my best friend would become so dear to me that his mere presence is the only thing that will often calm my worried heart. <br />
I didn't know that I would look in his eyes at times when I feel tired, defeated, overweight, ugly, and see that to him I am still the only woman in the world. <br />
I didn't know how hard we would learn to laugh at the silliest things, often requiring no words of explanation. <br />
I didn't know how strong his hand would feel holding mine, when I was in labor with our oldest child. I didn't know how deeply that gift of parenthood would strengthen our bond and make my love for him grow ten-fold. <br />
7 years ago, I didn't know what struggles we had yet to face, that he would lift my chin when I cried tears over the loss of pregnancies, grandparents, and failed dreams.<br />
I didn't know he would find ways to make me smile in my very darkest moments, when my heart felt dead and my faith had given up.<br />
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They say hindsight is 20/20, and looking back on my life there are many, many things I would change. There is so much I could do better. There are two words I will never, ever take back. That "I do" that I said 7 years ago, I would say again. I would say it over and over, shouting it from the highest of heights, "I DO, I DO, I DO!" <br />
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Christopher William Jeska, you are still the love of my life. With you as my husband, we have overcome many obstacles, and I'm sure we will face many more. But there is no one in this world I would rather do life with. Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-3363537765774363552014-09-30T17:12:00.001-05:002014-09-30T17:12:24.750-05:00Let's Begin AgainIt's a fine line in the social media world we live in today. Caught between the lines of a fake, picture perfect internet presence and constantly downtrodden, whiny, attention seeking poster. I know there are many that fall gracefully in between the two, but I constantly fear swinging too far to one side or the other. <br />
Lately I've been feeling compelled to blog again. Several times over the past few weeks I've visited my blog and even clicked the "new post" link but haven't been sure where to go from there. I kept feeling like God was telling me to get back on here, keep sharing my story. Be present, be real. I feel like I don't have anything worthwhile to say these days. The few things I do have to say are said so much better by so many other eloquent bloggers. And yet, I felt called to log in again. To be a mom in the midst of all the struggles that go along with being a mom. Maybe it's for my own growth, my own healing. I'd be okay with that.<br />
Whatever the reason, I'm back for now, ready to share my story. I just need to decide where to start...Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-18527791829848655072013-04-29T16:19:00.001-05:002013-04-29T16:19:25.529-05:00Our big fat moveSo, I'd pretty much decided to give up blogging. I just don't have enough to say that someone else out there isn't already saying. However, recent big changes have led me to change my mind. Namely, moving 4 hours away, changing jobs, and growing tired of everyone asking why we would possibly want to live in the small town in the middle of nowhere. So here it is, I'm finally ready to open up, and fess up, to what's going on with the Jeska fam.<br />
Last fall, we came home to Great Bend, a small town in Central Kansas where my parents and sister and brother in law live, for a quick weekend visit. Every visit with my family is too short, but this one was especially hard, my heart truly felt pulled. I felt like God was telling me this we where we were supposed to be, supposed to raise our boys. I cried most of the way back to Kansas City after that trip. I cried because I was tired of feeling like I was always saying goodbye to family, because I felt like my boys would grow up without knowing what it meant to have big family dinners on a regular basis, because my mom has always been my best friend and I was tired of being without her. Mostly I cried because I felt stuck. Chris and I talked a lot about it during that drive. We promised to spend time in prayer, seeking guidance and open doors. For a while nothing changed, good jobs can be hard to find in a small town, but our patience did finally pay off. I interviewed for a job at HaysMed and was offered a position in mid March. At this point we still weren't sure what Chris would do, but through family connections we were sure he could find decent employment here. Once again, God answered prayer. After discussion with his managers and his boss, he found out he will be able to stay on with his current company and work from home in Great Bend! God is so good!<br />
I also have always wanted to raise my boys in a small town. I truly was terrified of having kids with a bad case of what I like to call "Johnson County Syndrome." I hope here in Great Bend, we can find a slower pace with more time to just. Be. Family.<br />
Now for what tends to become the elephant in the room; "you're living with your parents?!?"<br />
Chris and I both went to private college, it's where we met and fell in love. I wouldn't trade that for any amount of money in the world. However, in the process, we also acrued a significant amount of student loan debt. In Kansas City, we were able to get by, but I'd be lying if I told you we weren't living paycheck to paycheck most of the time to keep up. We got tired of spinning our wheels and feeling like we were getting nowhere, like we'd be paying on these loans for 30 years and stuck in a vicious cycle until we were over 50. We both wanted more than that. We want to enjoy life,<br />
We don't want to just get by. We want family vacations, we want a nice home, we want private school for our boys, we wanted things we just couldn't afford if we wanted to pay off all this debt. We read the Dave Ramsey book a few times. I don't agree with a lot of what he says, but we did see clearly that something had to change, and if we stayed in KC, or even came here and got a place of<br />
our own, it wouldn't. On top of wanting to get all those loans paid off, Chris is planning on going back to school in the fall, and this time we wanted to be able to afford to pay tuition out of pocket, no more student loans for us!. To say living with my parents is a sacrifice would be a stretch to say the least. My mom and dad are so incredibly supportive, they have made the whole transition better than I could have imagined. We have a whole floor with 3 bedrooms all to ourselves, in ways I feel like we have more space than we did in our home in Gardner. The neighborhood is one Ive always dreamed of raising my boys in. Benton has already had hours of fun playing with two neighbor boys his age. But its been hard being away from Chris while he finishes things up in KC. It's also been very humbling, some days I wake up and feel like a huge failure for having to move back home. Satan reminds me that I'm not good enough, because while everyone else is moving forward, we had to take some giant leaps back. I try to remind myself that we are doing the right thing, and I really do believe we are.<br />
I'm excited to post pictures of our new bedrooms and bathroom once they are all remodeled, and I'll keep you posted on my new job and some exciting things coming up for Benton. In the meantime, will you please pray for my heart in this time of adjustment. Pray that we quickly find Christian friends our age to do life with, and that we find our niche in the new small town.Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-79732010133909567942013-01-29T08:48:00.000-06:002013-01-29T08:48:14.583-06:00Rainy morningEarly this morning Benton came running into my room crying. Even small rainstorms have always been a bit scary for him.<br />
"Mommy, why does the rain and thunder have to come to our house?"<br />
"The rain has to come so new things can grow," was the only answer I could come up with in my dazed, still half asleep state. Then it hit me, the simplicity of the analogy that I've heard a million times. It's old and cliche but to me today, in this weather, it was beautiful. It was the reminder I needed.<br />
The past few weeks have felt a little grey and cloudy. The past few days my spirit has felt weary, like it was left out in a cold rain. I'm reminded this morning of God's promises of new mercies, and the beauty of his blessings through trials.<br />
Can you sense the new things about to grow? I think I can :)Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-16600601117019955992013-01-26T17:49:00.000-06:002013-01-26T17:49:28.156-06:00tough choices<br />
I hate decisions.<br />
Don't ask me where I want to go for dinner, I don't care.<br />
Don't make me choose which outfit you should wear, I think they both look great.<br />
The truth is, I've always been horrible at making up my mind. Part of it is the woman in me, and the other part of it is the planner in me. If I can't know with certainty the outcome of any particular situation, I can't feel confident choosing a direction. Then I had kids...<br />
Did you know decisions are 287 times harder to make once you have kids? (I'm not sure on those exact numbers, but that's what it feels like...someone should do a study...) Every little choice feels like it will completely change the course of your children's lives, and nothing is more scary than thinking things could be less than perfect for little people who rely entirely on you for everything. More than lack of sleep, temper tantrums, and never ending laundry combined, big decisions are, in my opinion, the hardest part of being a parent.<br />
Lately Chris and I have been in the middle of a few very big decisions. Deciding to go back to school, deciding to possibly change jobs, and as a result of both those decisions, deciding to move away from Kansas City. There are so many reasons I feel like we should move ahead with these decisions, and so many reasons I'm terrified we will regret it. I worry about moving away from both of the boys' God-parents, all of our best friends, our small group. I'm scared to leave behind the home where both of my boys have spent most of their lives so far, like moving will cause me to lose the memories. I sit here, literally crying, because I am so scared of the unknown.<br />
My dear friend gave me the "Jesus Calling" devotional book for Christmas (if you don't have it, go out right now this second and buy it...seriously). I loved this tidbit from a few days back:<br />
<em>"... when the path becomes rocky and steep. Breathe deep draughts of My Presence, and hold tightly to My hand. Together we can make it!" </em><br />
Will you pray for us? Pray that we would find clear guidance in the weeks and months ahead, as well as peace in the decisions we make, that the right doors are opened at the right times, and that in the meantime I am able to cherish these moments of the "in-between."Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-10252693677333544942012-12-20T18:26:00.000-06:002012-12-20T18:26:43.350-06:00In my head today...<span style="font-size: xx-small;">**PUBLISHERS COMMENT: This is another post that rambles. Sorry, I've been doing that a lot lately. I guess my mind is adrift and this is how I process my thoughts**</span><br />
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I became one of them. I swore I never would. It happened anyway. I became one of those people who checks their phone every 5 minutes, who can't let an e-mail go for more than 24 hours unanswered, who didn't want to miss a Facebook post or Instagram photo op. <br />
In the midst of all the new high tech ways to connect I was missing out on chances to connect with the people right in front of me, face to face. <br />
I had to take a hard look at myself and how attached I was becoming to my phone, and I didn't like what I was seeing. It started small, no big deal if I answer this call really quick during dinner, right? Then it grew. I'm just going to check my e-mail REALLY quick before I get that juice Benton just asked me for. Suddenly I felt like I'd missed it all. <br />
I hate admitting that I forgot how to just sit, how to just BE. <br />
Do you remember when you were 10, and if you needed to talk to a friend, you knew you had to wait until they would be home to answer the phone? Remember when you would get actual pictures from family in the (REAL) mailbox? Remember how all that was okay? Somedays I think about getting rid of my smartphone all together, sometimes I HATE knowing what's going on with everyone and how crazy competitive it can make me. Why do I let it bug me when my cowoker has 37 likes on a photo of thier kid and I only have 4? Why do I find myself jealous when somone gets a chance to craft that Pintrest project before I do and everyone tells them what an awesome idea it is? Why do I care??? More importantly, how do I stop it? <br />
I'm taking a step back this holiday season, I'm not sure for how long. I've deleted Instagram, Facebook, and Pintrest apps from my phone. I'm checking peoples blogs less and calling people more than texting to catch up. I'm finding ways to really truly savor each day with my boys, it is flying by too fast and I'm tired of feeling like I'm missing it.<br />
I hope I can encourage you in the last days of this holiday season to join me- put your phone away for a few hours. Don't even check it, put it on silent and leave it alone while you squeeze your kids and laugh with your husband...and if you can't reach me, know that I'm doing the same :)Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-86917320621132109132012-12-14T18:06:00.001-06:002012-12-14T18:06:27.167-06:00DealingWow. Sigh. Wow.<br />
I don't know how to process what happened today, I don't know where to start. I feel like I owe it to myself to write this post so I can, at least in some shape, work though my thoughts. <br />
Shortly after hearing the news I looked in the eyes of my 3 year old son and began to weep. How? Why? It makes me want to scream and vomit at the same time. It makes me want to lock my doors and never leave my children's sides. Our hearts are heavy and our heads are spinning as we greave for the families in CT tonight.<br />
There are questions that will never be answered but my trust remains in a God who bears all our burdens and hears all our prayers. Even in these dark hours I see that glimmer of light. With Christmas so close, I can find peace in His promises, even as I fear for the future of my boys.<br />
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Innocent babies are being cradled by the loving arms of angels tonight, and they will never again shed a tear or feel pain. May our hearts remember that this world is not our home, this story is not the end. May all of us who have children waiting for us in Heaven remember that the Christmas story is the beginning of the reason we will one day hold them in our arms again.<br />
Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-8480576737598103132012-11-28T18:11:00.000-06:002012-11-28T18:14:41.006-06:00Pie, pie, oh my!Our church recently had their annual fall festival (oh wait...not that recent...a month ago) and of course, I had to enter a pie in the annual pie contest. I needed to find a way to top my pie from last year (last year I did a peanut butter fudge pie that won best presentation) and I think I did! I made it again for Thanksgiving and actually got to eat a big fat slice topped with ice cream. Yum. Add this pie to your Christmas table, I promise you won't be disappointed! I make mine with a from scratch pie crust, because that buttery flaky crust is my favorite part of any pie, but you could also do a frozen crust if you're feeling lazy or crunched for time. <br />
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Caramel Cranberry Apple Pie</h2>
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Pie crust:</h3>
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2 1/2 cups all purpose flour</div>
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1 tsp salt</div>
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1 tsp sugar</div>
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1 cup butter</div>
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1/4 cup very cold water</div>
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Cut your butter into very small pieces and put half of them in the freezer and the other half in the fridge for about 15 minutes. </div>
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Break out your hefty Kitchen Aid stand mixer and combine the flour, salt, sugar and butter until just mixed (your butter should still be chunky).</div>
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Add 1/4 cup ice cold water and mix until crumbly but holds together when squeezed. Add more water 1 tbsp at at time if needed. DO NOT over mix. You want those little chunks of butter because they will create the buttery little air pockets when you bake.</div>
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Turn onto work surface and knead once or twice into a ball. Chill until ready to use.</div>
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Filling:</h3>
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4 green apples</div>
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1/2 cup butter</div>
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1 tbsp flour</div>
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2 tbsp cornstarch</div>
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2 tbsp water</div>
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1 tbsp vanilla extract</div>
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1/2 cup white sugar</div>
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1/2 cup brown sugar</div>
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1 tsp cinnamon</div>
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1/2 tsp nutmeg</div>
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1 bag dried cranberries</div>
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Preheat oven to 350 F. Fill a medium bowl with water. Peel and slice apples and place in the water to prevent them from browning until you are ready for them. </div>
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Melt the butter in a medium-large pot over medium heat. Stir in flour and cornstarch to create a roux. Add 2 tbsp of water and the vanilla, sugars, cinnamon, and nutmeg. Bring to a simmer. Drain apples and add along with cranberries. Cook 5 min, stirring constantly. Remember to stand over the pot and savor the aroma, I swear at this point you have the smell of the holidays all simmering in one big pot.</div>
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Remove from heat and allow to cool while you roll out crusts.</div>
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Divide your dough in half and roll one half out on a lightly floured surface. You want your dough approx 14 inches around to fill a 9 inch pie plate. Fill with your mixture of apple yumminess and add your second crust. You can cover the whole thing and slit, create a lattice top, or get extra festive and cut out some leaves like I did! Sprinkle with extra cinnamon sugar if desired.</div>
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Bake at 350 for 50-60 min until crust is golden. Best when served a la mode :)</div>
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Now it's your turn! Link back with your favorite holiday dessert!!!</div>
Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-14035594415794321272012-11-08T21:39:00.000-06:002012-11-08T21:39:37.552-06:00FailSo the toddler lunch thing...yeah...about that...<br />
In theory it was a great idea, and I'm super proud of myself that I can honestly say I haven't repeated a lunch since we started. Unfortunatly, I haven't been very consistant when it comes to the whole taking pictures and keeping records portion of the challenge. I could also see that the few posts I made on the topic weren't getting much traffic so I think its time to scrap the idea. Maybe I'll try again when life feels a little less like I'm caught in a sandstorm. (Will life ever again feel like I'm not caught in a sandstorm?)Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-52065421541821601192012-10-27T21:39:00.000-05:002012-10-27T21:39:23.771-05:00happy respiratory care weekThis past week has been Respiratory Care week. Essentially this means lots of yummy free food at work and a "gift" from our department. Throughout the week several of my RT friends have posted a link to this video on their facebook pages. I'm normally not big on this kind of thing (a little too cheesy in my opinion), but I have so many friends (and honestly I sometimes think my family) who really don't understand WHAT I actually do. They know my title but not my job. In fact I have to remind some of my friends that I'm NOT a nurse even though I wear scrubs and work in a hospital. So watch it. You may not understand what we do now, but someday we may help save your life. I am proud of my job and love what I do. And if you know an RT, don't forget to give them a hug this week :)<div>
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<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e91OIUDPeQc">WHO AM I?</a></div>
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Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-78757371576484313572012-10-27T21:21:00.002-05:002012-10-27T21:21:33.800-05:00toddler lunches. weekly windupWell, I did it! I made it through one week without repeating a single lunch...only 5 weeks to go. I've decided to rate all meals on a scale from 1 to 5. One is a total flop and five is staying on the lunchtime rotation. As promised, here's the summary:<div>
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Day one:</div>
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<br />Meal: Turkey, tomato, and cream cheese panini, apple wedges<br />
Overall rating: 4 1/2!!!<br />
Pros: Delish! Different! I can't say enough about how much I loved this lunch.<br />
Cons: I hate cleaning my panini maker<br />
Benton and I were heading in from playing outside for lunch and I spied the panini maker that didn't sell in our yard sale sitting in a box by our garage door. We hadn't used this sucker a SINGLE time and were going to get rid of it, but I decided on a whim that today was the day. As I was reaching for the american cheese to throw together a few croque monsieur's, the cream cheese fell out and I was inspired. The final creation was a turkey, tomato, and cream cheese panini. Friends, I have a new favorite sandwich. Seriously, go to your fridge right now, get out the ingredients and make one. IT. WAS. AWESOME. So easy, so tasty.The only reason I am only giving this one 4 1/2 stars instead of 5 was that Benton didn't finish his apples and I LOATHE cleaning the panini maker (uh, hello, who makes things that can't be put in a dishwasher?!?)<br />
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Day two:<br />
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Meal: Chicken nuggets, cherry tomatoes, applesauce<br />
Overall rating: 3<br />
Pros: Easy<br />
Cons: Processed<br />
Frozen chicken fingers, applesauce, and baby tomatoes. Nothing exciting here, but I didn't promise wonderful creations everyday, I just promised different food every day. The fact of the matter is, I'm a working mom with 2 little kids and a busy life, I don't always have time to *COOK* and *CREATE.* Today my brain was shutdown and Benton got his way when it came time for the "What's for lunch" dilemma. On the plus side, Benton ate his whole meal.<br />
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Day three:<br />
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Meal: Whole wheat spaghetti with meat sauce, grapes, strawberry yogurt</div>
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Overall rating: 4</div>
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Pros: Healthy (somewhat?)</div>
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Cons: Slightly time consuming</div>
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For some reason when I'm cooking for lunch (I rarely if ever eat what Benton's eating) anything that takes more than 5 minutes is too much work. However, for his sake, I'm trying to invest a little more. I have learned a few tricks that I'm going to use to make mealtimes easier without being from a box. Example: cook up a pound of ground turkey (or beef) and freeze into 8 small portions for mixing into recipes. Suddenly, spaghetti with meat sauce takes less time than mac and cheese. Add some fruit and yogurt and it's a meal Benton and I both agree on.</div>
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Day four:</div>
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Meal: Chicken and Biscuits, chocolate chip cookie</div>
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Overall rating: 2</div>
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Pros: Easy. </div>
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Cons: Cheating</div>
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I'm calling this one cheating because even though it't not a lunch repeat, it is a dinner repeat. Leftovers from the night before. I'm actually a fan of leftovers from time to time but I always feel guilty serving them to TBenton. He gives me the "Aww mom, not again" almost every time. I also didn't add any fruit or healthy veggies so this meal really was a flop in my opinion. The only reason the meal didn't get a one is because Benton ate it without complaining. </div>
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Day five: </div>
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Meal: Chicken nugget happy meal with fries and apples</div>
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Overall rating: 5</div>
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Pros: Who doesn't love a happy meal???</div>
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Cons: Half my readers just decided I'm a bad mom for feeding my kid McDonalds</div>
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When I was a kid, I LOVED going to McDonald's at Halloween time to get the Trick or Treating pail Happy Meal. I looked up nutrition facts and a chicken nugget happy meal comes to only 300 calories (not counting the milk, forgot to add that in) so I honestly don't care what you say, I don't feel guilty at all letting my kid have one from time to time. Additionally, I'm sure he burnt half those calories off running through the play place. </div>
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It has been a great week. As I'm sitting here with Benton down to bed, cuddling with Jude under my cozy quilt, I can't help but feel thankful for all the blessings in my life. Thanks for being my virtual accountability partners in this meal challenge!</div>
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Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-88238519621244817482012-10-17T22:34:00.002-05:002012-10-17T22:35:35.815-05:00Toddler Lunches, No Repeats; a 30 day challengeWe are in a rut- a big, fat, super deep rut. In fact, I'm pretty sure if I cook one more box of mac and cheese I might scream. Maybe worse. Benton has about 5 lunches we rotate through on a regular basis and I'm beginning to be concerned about him becoming too picky and not eating enough of all the food groups (namely veggies). In an effort to change it up, I've decided to create a 6 week challenge (Monday through Friday) to have a different lunch everyday for little man. My goal is to post pics weekly of each meal as well as a score based on the ease of preparation, health content, overall appeal, and most importantly, toddler approval. I'd love to have some of my fellow bloggers join me so we can share ideas! In the meantime, whats your favorite "go-to" meal for lunchtime?Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-80485152178117760692012-10-10T23:11:00.000-05:002012-10-10T23:11:13.057-05:00WOAH...update!Yes, I am still alive.<br />
Yes, I do now have a baby- a beautiful, healthy, perfect in every single way baby boy. Since the last time I posted I was still VERY pregnant, it may be hard to believe that my little Jude is already 3 1/2 months old. I can't stand how fast the time is flying. I just want to stop and soak in every single second right now. My lack of blog updates has been in part due to the new baby, in part due to going back to work, and in part due to a computer which remains un-fixed post the Benton-Water Incident of 2011. But I digress...<br />
I'm hoping to get back on the blogging bandwagon with a vengence now that my life is starting to resume a somewhat normal routine. I was recently caught answering the question "Why blog?" and it occured to me that I blog for so many reasons, so I need to stay on top of it! <br />
Today I'm going to give you the quick "Catch up, rundown" of the last 4 months. Then you are going to comment about how much you are glad I'm back to blogging and how much you missed me and how you checked my blog daily for updates. Deal?<br />
<br />
June- Spent the majority of the month eagerly awaiting baby boy's arrival. Sweet Jude Adlen made his entry on June 28th at 12:18 pm. He was just a little guy, weighing 6 lb, 15 oz (Does anyone remember how much I boo-hooed that I was going to have a big baby thanks to the stupid GD???) My heart feels so overwhelmed with love for my boys, it's hard to imagine life without either of them.<br />
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July- LOVED having the summer as at SAHM while on maternity leave. I spent lots of time with family, cuddling my boys, connecting with friends, and enjoying God's many blessings in my life. I got to help throw a few bridal showers, including one for my sister which was so fun! <br />
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August- Was much like July. Chris and I started going to the farmers market every week for fresh produce and flowers and Benton became buddies with our neighbor boy, Jacob. Is he really old enough to start playing with the neighborhood kids already? It doesn't feel possible and I certainly don't feel ready to "let go." We also started doing basic lessons every day and I'm proud to say that Benton now can sound out all his letters, write most of them, and read several basic words and simple books. I'm sure every mom feels this way, but I think he is one gifted little man ;) We've recently started working on simple math and talking about the seasons as well. The last week of August we headed to Great Bend to begin final preparations for my sisters wedding. I'm not going to talk to much about that because it wasn't entierly a pleasant experience. I did love getting to be with my family, at least. That's what matters, right???<br />
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September- My sister got married on the 1st and Benton was by far the cutest ring bearer there ever was! The wedding came together, much to my surprise, and the only real downfall of the actual wedding day was the unbearable heat. I'm happy for my sister and her new husband, however, and wish them many many years of happiness. I went back to work the first week of September (tear). I'm so blessed to be able to work just part time now. I have somewhat ideal hours (our boys only need about 10-11 hours TOTAL of childcare per week) and still get to feel like I'm contributing. While I think about my kiddos non-stop at work, I'm thankful for where I'm at right now in the situation. I turned **. Birthdays just aren't fun at this age, I don't care what you say. Finally, we went to MN for a visit with my in-laws. It was actually a great trip, we came home feeling very blessed.<br />
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October- Chris and I just celebrated our 5 year anniversary! I can't believe it!!! It has been an amazing 5 years, and I can honestly say the cliche holds true, I am more in love today than I was 5 years ago. We also took our teens on a youth retreat last weekend, which was amazing. Watching our teens grow spiritually touches my heart like few other things can. This weekend we have NO plans, and I am SO excited about that.<br />
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I have a few blog posts coming that I'm excited about, including:<br />
Bedroom re-vamp (It's going to be gorg!)<br />
A few recipes I've tried recently (Promise, they are YUM!)<br />
And more that I'm still reworking in my head...can't give away too much at once, ya know :)<br />
<br />
So how about you, how was your summer? Give me deets!Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-55261127178341257652012-06-10T21:42:00.002-05:002012-06-10T21:42:59.231-05:0036 1/2 week update!!!!I think I'm the worst blogger ever.<br />
Anyway, since it's been OVER a month since my last pregnancy update, I figure I should do one more. This will be my last one, since this baby will be here in just over three weeks (or less) one way or another. Here we go!<br />
<strong>How far along:</strong> 36 1/2 weeks<br />
<strong>Total Weight Gain:</strong> 19 lbs<br />
<strong>Stretchmarks:</strong> UGH. Really started making an appearance over the last month. Yuck<br /><strong>Sleep:</strong> Ever since I started my new work schedule I've been sleeping really great. I do wake up once or twice to potty but otherwise go right back to sleep. Probably helps that I'm non-stop exhausted :)<br />
<strong>Best Moment This Week:</strong> Finishing the room. Looks good. Feels good. I feel ready. I like that.<br /><strong>Movement:</strong> Movement is slowly dying down. Lots of hiccups though.<br /><strong>Gender:</strong> Boy<br /><strong>Labor Signs:</strong> Every little cramp or bit of pressure I hope means something..but alas no real indication of labor coming anytime soon.<br /><strong>Belly Button:</strong> Innie<br /><strong>What I Miss:</strong> All my favorite foods. I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes a week or two after my last post and it is...depressing...exhausting...my worst nightmare. Okay, so it's not THAT bad, but its one of the main reasons I'm feeling so eager for this pregnancy to be over. It is not fun having cravings and having to ignore them. In fact, an extreme form of torture.<br />
<strong>What I am Looking Forward to:</strong> Meeting my baby boy in the next few weeks! SO CLOSE!!!<br /><strong>Milestones: </strong>We had a biophysical profile screen (fancy ultrasound) last week and baby was measuring 6 lbs, 1 oz. EXACTLY 50 percentile for where he should be this far along. This is a HUGE blessing to me, after being diagnosed with GD I was constantly having nightmares that he was already 8 or 9 lbs and going to be huge. I feel much more at peace that he should be a very normal size baby. Also, as of this week I will be full term! I can't believe it!!!!Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-50386879995656059282012-05-01T22:18:00.002-05:002012-05-01T22:18:57.757-05:00Happy 3rd Birthday to my sweet baby boy!!Okay, so I'm FINALLY posting, about 2 and a half weeks late, and update from all the April goings on, primarily revolving around my little man turning 3. I still am not ready to accept that he's growing up, that he's a year away from preschool, that every day he needs me a little less.<br />
Two was an amazing year, watching all the changes as Benton learned to play harder, speak clearer, and really show a personality (which, by the way, I am in love with). We spent his actual birthday in Wichita so he could swim at the hotel and ride all the "roll toasters" (roller coasters) at a little carnival-esque amusement park call "All Star Sports." <br />
The real party was a week later. Everyone keeps asking me how it went and I cannot seem to emphasize enough how totally happy I was with everything. I have never in my life seen Benton smile more than I have that day (and believe me, he smiles a lot!) So many friends showed up celebrate with him too, which was fun. <br />
<img alt="" aria-label="Photo: Never seen a kid as excited as he was when he got his cake" class="scaledImageFitWidth img" height="675" src="http://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn1/p480x480/528088_564713643799_162800101_31206954_2141718739_n.jpg" width="403" /><br />
I think his favorite part was this moment, when all eyes were on him singing "Happy Birthday."<br />
Oh my goodness, I love this boy!<br />
Three is sure to be an exciting year, I can't wait to see Benton grow more, and watch as he transforms from only child to big brother. I am truly blessed.Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-76425578713582100392012-04-13T00:45:00.000-05:002012-04-13T00:45:25.274-05:00Baby update- week 28!!<strong>How far along:</strong> 28 weeks (and one day). Third trimester already, I am in disbelief.<br />
<strong>Total Weight Gain:</strong> 13 pounds...although I feel like its 25<br />
<strong>Stretchmarks:</strong> Starting to notice them a lot more on the top of my belly. I don't think they are "new," just more prominent.<br />
<strong>Sleep:</strong> I'm finally starting to not sleep as well...waking up every few hours for a potty break and reposition<br />
<strong>Best Moment This Week:</strong> Getting the room painted! I am loving how the nursery is coming together, I've been spending a lot of time lately rocking in my new rocker (thanks mom!!!) just feeling him kick and imagining what it will be like to finally hold him.<br />
<strong>Movement:</strong> Tons and tons of movement. Even when he is kicking straight down and it hurst like...a lot, I love the little reminders that he's right here and all mine for a little bit longer.<br />
<strong>Gender:</strong> Still very much a boy<br />
<strong>Labor Signs:</strong> I had some cramping/contractions last weekend but they are gone now and I'm back to praying he stays nice and cozy in there until July 4th.<br />
<strong>Belly Button:</strong> Innie<br />
<strong>What I Miss:</strong> Being able to sit comforably...and breathe normally. I'm really starting to run out of room and we have a long ways to grow!<br />
<strong>What I am Looking Forward to:</strong> My baby shower next weekend! I'm so blessed.<br />
<strong>Milestones: </strong>Baby is 2 lbs and 10 oz according to yesterdays ultrasound, and measuring just a little ahead of where he should be. Since my antibody screen came back positive earlier in the pregnancy, I'm starting to have ultrasounds and dr appointments every week now so we can keep a closer eye on the little man. I'm dreading having to go so often but thankful that I have a dr this time around who is very effecient (I rarely wait more than 5 minutes to be seen) and also that I'll get LOTS of extra views of him.<br />
Here's a pictures of (approx) what hes looking like these days:<br />
<img alt="Baby, fetus at 28 weeks - BabyCenter" border="0" height="307" name="switch" src="http://www.babycenter.com/i/m/stages/popups/28/index.jpg" usemap="#rollover_Map" width="320" /><br />
In other news: Benton's 3rd birthday is on Saturday. I think I might die. When did my baby grow up?? I'm looking forward to spending the next two days spoiling him rotten, and will post about it soon :)Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-72209717054313351332012-04-10T22:59:00.000-05:002012-04-10T22:59:52.235-05:00Silly Quiz answers ;PMy lovely friend Kim from <a href="http://dorothy78.blogspot.com/">"Life is...</a> tagged me in a "Getting to know you" style quiz. Anyone remember 8th grade when you emailed one of these chain letters on a daily basis? No? That was just me....oh well. I'm a sucker for 'em, so here we go again<br />
<br />
There are five rules:<br />
1. Post these rules.<br />
2. Post a photo of yourself and 11 random things.<br />
3. Answer the questions set for you in the original post.<br />
4. Create 11 new questions.<br />
5. Tag 5 friends and go to their blog/twitter and tell them that you've tagged them.<br />
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Okay, step one, a photo of myself:<br />
<img alt="" aria-busy="true" aria-describedby="fbPhotosSnowliftCaption" class="spotlight" height="320" src="http://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/529000_10150656142763137_701763136_9321648_805409510_n.jpg" style="height: 781px; width: 586px;" width="240" /><br />
A picture of my hubs and I circa 2007 that was recently sent to me. Ahh to wear a size 6 again....moving on....<br />
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Step 2: eleven random things about me:<br />
1. I have an unhealthy obsession with cleaning products. I've recently forced myself to cool it down quite a bit, but, oddly, I love browsing the aisles in Target to see what new, wonderfully scented, miracle product they've come out with now.<br />
2. I don't really like cooking. Or baking. I don't mind it, but I don't really enjoy it. I've discovered what I love is SERVING great food to people. The actual process of getting there, not so much. This is actually a fairly new revelation to myself I discovered when I began to dread that 4:30, time to start dinner time of day.<br />
3. Pentel RSVP ink pens are my absolute favorite writing utensil. (Hey, you asked for random)<br />
4. I don't really like yougert. I eat it almost daily. It's healthy. Would much rather have ice cream. Or french fries.<br />
5. I don't like the greeting time at church on Sunday mornings. I'm too introverted. It always just makes me feel awkward, and I am inwardly having a panic attack every time they announce it until it's over.<br />
6. When I was in high school I was nominated by several classmates at the end of my senior year as the biggest slacker of our class. I still maintain that they were just jealous becuase they didn't plan ahead and take all their senior level classes a year early so they could finish off high school with a year of easy electives.<br />
7. I only put on makeup a few days a week. Not worth my time anymore.<br />
8. About 50% of the time I'm driving, I wish I had a new car. The other 50% of the time I swear I'm going to drive my car until it has over 200,000 miles on it and no longer starts in cold weather.<br />
9. I'm an impulse buyer.<br />
10. I have wide feet- I hate shopping for dress shoes and cute sandals.<br />
11. I'm really bored of trying to come up with random things about myself.<br />
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<u>Questions from Kim:<br />
</u>1. What is your favorite season and why? Fall! I love the anticipation of the holidays and all the warm smells.<br />
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2. What is your favorite movie of all time? Rent. Chris and I went to see it for our first date EVER and as a result, it will always hold a very special place in my heart.<br />
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3. Do you still have your tonsils? Yup<br />
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4. What was your first car? A 1992 Pontiac GrandAm...baby blue, grey cloth interior.<br />
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5. How did we meet? Living Hope Church<br />
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6. What is the #1 guilty pleasure song you have on your <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_15">iPod</span>, iPhone, MP3 etc? I don't have any music of my own loaded on my iPhone, but my iPod (which I haven't used in years) has every Britney Spears album ever created.<br />
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7. Would your dream vacation be to the beach or the mountains? Beach!!!<br />
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8. If money wasn't a factor, what would your dream job/career be? I'm doing it...but I would do it MUCH more part time (one 4 or 8 hour shift per week) and otherwise be a SAHM<br />
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9. What is your favorite snack? Chili Cheese Fries<br />
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10. If you were going to paint your living room, what color would you choose and why? maybe tan?<br />
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11. What is the one item in your home (excluding people or pets) that you would save first if there was a fire? Benton's baby book and my wedding album (I can say both becuase they are right next to each other on the shelf, there's no way I would grab just one.)<br />
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Okay, I'm not going to create 11 new questinons and tag friends, mainly becuase most of my blogger friends who would actually do this have already done it. I'm lame like that. <br />
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<a href="http://dorothy78.blogspot.com/"></a>Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-44574951865726983522012-03-20T05:21:00.001-05:002012-03-20T05:22:09.895-05:00Purple finger nailsYep. I'm still alive. Haven't blogged in...a few months??? I knew this day would eventually come. The day I suddenly realized it had been months since I'd posted and few people would remember I even had one of these things. Anyone remember Xanga? Myspace?<br />
<br />
Well, I've put off posting much at all about my pregnancy. Every once in a while I'll make a facebook post about recent updates but I try not to too often. I remember how it felt when everyone around me was getting pregnant, and CONSTANTLY talking about it, while we were stuck trying and trying and trying. It was a jab in my heart every single time. A daily reminder of where I wanted to be but just wasn't. As a result, I've tried very hard to keep from doing the same things to dear friends of mine struggling with infertility in various forms. <br />
On the other hand, I also want to relish in this precious time, and share some of the wonderful blessings I'm experiencing with my family and friends. I remember a few friends posting weekly surveys about how things have been progressing and I've decided to do the same, but much less frequent. This way, I have something I can look back on and *someday* show the little one too.<br />
SO, here's my 24 (!!!!) week stats:<br />
<strong>How far along:</strong> 24 weeks- the BIG milestone (not counting end of first trimester). From this point on, no matter what happens to me, in a major emergency, baby would likely be able to survive outside the womb!<br />
<strong>Total Weight Gain:</strong> 8 pounds. I'm bummed...I didn't want to gain any weight. Why can't I have months of vomiting and weight loss like a normal pregnant person?<br />
<strong>Stretchmarks:</strong> None that I've noticed...but I try not to look ;)<br />
<strong>Sleep:</strong> Lots! I feel constantly exhausted, like I can never get enough sleep. I need lots of pillows these days to be nice and comfy<br />
<strong>Best Moment This Week:</strong> Getting to see him again and know that he's a he for sure!<br />
<strong>Movement:</strong> Finally started feeling movement from the outside a couple weeks ago, Chris got to feel Jude for the first time from the outside at about 22 1/2 weeks. I LOVE every little kick and squirm.<br />
<strong>Gender:</strong> BOY!!!!<br />
<strong>Labor Signs:</strong> Nada<br />
<strong>Belly Button:</strong> Still in. Probably will be the whole way through, it was with Benton<br />
<strong>What I Miss:</strong> Energy<br />
<strong>What I am Looking Forward to:</strong> Starting to put the room together! I think we've FINALLY chosen bedding (after changing our minds AGAIN!) so I'm ready to get to work!<br />
<strong>Milestones: </strong>Baby is now just over a pound and about a foot long (and my uterus is the size of a soccer ball...no wonder I'm feeling big!) Lungs are starting to develop more and produce surfactant (as an RT, this makes me very happy :) )<br />
Here's what baby looks like about now:<br />
<img alt="Baby, fetus at 24 weeks - BabyCenter" border="0" height="480px" name="switch" src="http://www.babycenter.com/i/m/stages/popups/24/index.jpg" usemap="#rollover_Map" width="500px" /><br />
Welp, that's it for this month in regards to baby Jude (Oh yeah, we have an name!!!) <br />
PS I painted my fingernails a really lovely pale purple for spring, and I am LOVING them...hence the title of this post :)Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-72402128653244237922012-01-03T23:07:00.000-06:002012-01-03T23:07:29.206-06:00My testimonyWhew, 2011! I can't say I'm sad to see you go! The year certainly had it's ups and downs, but a new year always feels like a breath of fresh air. About a month and a half ago, Chris and I were approached by our music minister and asked to share our testimony with the church for our Thanksgiving service. The thought absolutely terrified me. I have never been afraid of a stage, for those of you who don't know, Chris and I met in theatre. Speaking in front of a large crowd isn't what scared me so much, but sharing my heart was something I find hard enough to do with my closest friends. I really felt God asking me to do this for him, though, so I decided to give it a go. In the end, I was so blessed by the experience, and so grateful that I had been given this opportunity. A friend of mine at work, who had proof-read my final draft for me, encouraged me to post this on my blog as well. Despite my hesitation, I agree that it's a great way to give God the glory for the place he's brought me to, and am finally ready to share it with all of my friends and family who don't go to LHC. Here's your forewarning: this will probably be the longest post of my blogging career. Also, please note that this was written in early November, so when I refer to things that happened in the "last few weeks" they are actually news items from a few months ago. <br />
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Okay, here we go:<br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Wow! What a year! To say <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>the last 12 months have been the toughest year of our marriage, the toughest year of our lives so far would be an understatement.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Last Thanksgiving, we looked into the next year with excitement and anticipation of all the possibilities that lay before us. Chris had a new job opportunity that we found out would begin the following spring. In addition, we were finally expecting our second child, after trying to conceive for just short of a year. Our future looked bright and our hearts were full as we entered the holiday season. Little did we know that in just a few short weeks, our lives would begin a tailspin that would last nearly the whole year. The week of Christmas, my worst nightmare came true for a second time in my life: Chris and I experienced a miscarriage.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Christmas morning all I could do was cry: How on earth could I celebrate the birth of God’s son, when he had taken my baby away from me? In January and February, I began to cling to God for peace. As I drew nearer to him, I found peace in the fact that He may have allowed us to go through those circumstances to grow closer to him. As the months passed, however, and Chris and I began a long battle with what the doctors called “Secondary Unknown Infertility” which is doctor speak for “we just couldn’t get pregnant again and they couldn’t figure out why” my heart began to lose hope. Throughout the next several months, I continued to experience all the stages of grief that had begun in December. I cried out to God in anger, I prayed for peace, I begged for an answer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>On Easter morning, I was so mad at God, that I considered suicide. At the time, I thought God was being silent, or ignoring me. Now, I look back and wonder if I was so busy being nosy that I just couldn’t hear him screaming out to me to rest in his hands, to rest in his promises. In April, Chris moved to Oklahoma City to begin training for his new job, while I stayed behind to continue working and take care of Benton. While I tried to put on a “strong face” for the world, my heart continued to grow cold. My church attendance waned and I avoided my small group because I couldn’t stand the thought of my dearest friends seeing that I was dying inside. I also couldn’t stand to see how God was blessing everyone around me so beautifully while I felt left alone to suffer. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Oddly, despite all this, I never once doubted God existence. Questioned his motives? Daily. Hated Him for what he put us through? At times. Despite my lack of faith in His plan, I continued to pray daily, read Benton Bible stories, and keep my car radio tuned to a Christian station. When it came down to it, even though I was no longer interested in pursuing a relationship with God, I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt he was real, and I knew Benton had no future, if I didn’t continue to raise him to know and love God.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In August, Chris’s training ended, and on his final exam he “failed” his training by less than half a point. He found himself unemployed and we once again found ourselves wondering why. Every man has an instinctive desire to provide and care for his family. When Chris lost his job, he was forced to face issues of his worth as a husband and a father. Fortunately, while my faith had been growing ever weaker during the summer, God had been working in his heart, growing his faith stronger and renewing a passion for Him that would become infectious when he returned home. Throughout the 3 months that Chris was unemployed, God began to soften my heart, to remind me of his love. In the little things; the way Chris would hold me when I didn’t feel like I could face the world, the way Benton would say “lobe you” to us every night at bedtime, when one of the beautiful ladies from our small group would send me an encouraging message, or just remind me they were praying for us. In the big things, when Brady would lead a worship song about God’s ability to create beauty out of the darkest times in our lives, in the way God provided for EVERY need, our cabinets stayed full, and EVERY bill was always paid. As God began to soften my heart, I slowly became able, once again, to see all the ways I was so blessed, and as I was able to see my blessings more clearly, I was once again able to trust God’s plan for our lives, despite our lack of answers. As job opportunity after job opportunity fell through for Chris, God’s voice became louder and louder in my heart; “I have a plan for you, I’m not finished yet.” So we kept trusting, and kept believing. We are so happy to be able to tell you that just two weeks ago, Chris began working full time again. Even more exciting to us, last week we got to see the little tiny heartbeat of our beautiful little baby, scheduled to arrive early next July. God is not only worthy because of the way he blesses our lives, the way he responds to our hearts deepest desires in his own timing and own way. God is worthy because he has a plan for us. He is worthy because He keeps the promises he made to us thousands of years ago. He is WORTHY because even when we are so overcome by our circumstances that we want to pull away from Him, His love holds us near His heart. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Romans 8 38-39 “I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord”</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">God’s love, above all, is what makes Him worthy of our praise. In our deepest sorrows and when we stand atop a mountain of blessings, GOD IS WORTHY!</span></span></div>Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7424361573443251874.post-51006400956441744262011-12-14T02:43:00.000-06:002011-12-14T02:43:37.582-06:00'Tis the SeasonWow, has it really been 2 months since my last post? Either my life is really busy or just super boring- I'll leave it up to you to decide :)<br />
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Since I've been on a blogging hiatus recently, I'll keep it short and sweet- a little update to ease myself back into the blogging world...<br />
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Christmas is almost here and I am so excited for everything that means. God has truly been working in my heart this Advent season to remind me why I have such a huge reason to celebrate. I don't have a nativity scene up in my house, mostly because I have yet to find one (that I can afford) that I feel truly captures the beauty of what happened on that night 2000 years ago. I feel so blessed this season, so thankful for where God is taking me and my family, so excited to see what he has in store for us this holiday season and into 2012.<br />
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Our trees (yes, trees, 3 to be exact) are up and decroated. Since I once again changed my color schemes this year, I feel like they look a little bare, but hopefully I'll stick with this scheme next year and little by little they will fill up. My two golden angels, Faith and Hope, are hanging side by side on our living room tree to remind me of my two sweet angels up in heaven. Not a day goes by that a part of me doesn't long for the day when I can hold the both in my arms and tell them how much their mommy loves them. <br />
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Benton. Is. Oerney. I love him, but today he flooded my bathroom for the upteenth time and all I could do was thing, wow, this child must take after his father :) He is loving the Christmas season and almost every day tries to convince me to let him open presents. (Is that supposed to start this young?!?) He also loves showing off the tree in his room to EVERYONE who comes to visit.<br />
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I hope this season is finding your family as blessed as ours. In case you don't hear from me again for another two months: Merrry Christmas and Happy New Year!Andrea J.http://www.blogger.com/profile/18429015632300980230noreply@blogger.com1